Great coaches know the value of a well-placed either/or question. I learned what a huge upgrade this type of question could be while studying with (the late) Thomas Leonard at his Graduate School of Coaching.
One evening, in a class called The Clarifiers, I volunteered to coach. (Always volunteer in class. You'll learn ten times more than everyone else.)
I was given five minutes to coach, using just five of the following list of 15 clarifying questions, nothing else. The "client" (another coaching student who had a genuine problem she wanted to solve) made a huge shift in her thinking and at the end of five minutes, her problem had been eliminated. Wow!
Masterful coaches have tools that eliminate the need to figure out, work hard, take responsibility for, or solve their clients problems. Their skills do the work for them. At the School of Coaching Mastery, coaches learn these tools and how to use them masterfully. We have our own list of either/or questions, but in case you're interested, here are Thomas':
1. Urgent or Important?
2. Addressed or Avoiding?
3. Accurate or Interpretation?
4. Open or Resistant?
5. Internal or External Reference Point?
6. Want or Could/Should/Need?
7. Opportunity or Possibility?
8. Source or Symptom?
9. Opening or Share?
10. Response or Reaction?
11. Create or Eliminate?
12. Problem or Concern?
13. Present or Past?
14. Acceptance or Resistance?
15. Toward or Away From?
Clarifiers Copyright, CoachVille, 2002 (Used with permission)
Another great source of enlightening either/or questions is Debbie Ford's book, The Right Questions.
Copyright, Julia Stewart, 2007
http://www.yourlifepart2.com
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